Shortly
after tying the knot, a young married couple started arguing over who should
make the coffee. Being a good Christian woman, the wife went to the scriptures
for her answer. She said that the Bible specifically stated that men should be
the ones to make the coffee.
Puzzled,
the husband asked her where in the Bible it said that. Very confidently, the
wife opened up her Bible and said: “It’s right here—HEBREWS.”
What
kind of man was Boaz before he married Ruth? Answer: He was Ruthless.
After
having children, Adam and Eve started getting a lot of questions from their
kids about why they no longer lived in Eden. Adam has a simple answer for this:
“Your mother ate us out of house and home.”
Carl and his lovely wife Margaret had been married 60+
years. True love, as it seems, rolls its eyes and puts up with those same corny
jokes year after year.
During my time with them, “Marge” became critically ill and
had major surgery at UPenn, 90 miles from home. For several months she was in
ICU and on a ventilator. Marge’s prognosis was not good, but Carl vigilantly
stayed by her bedside. The hospital had become his home away from home. He
slept on uncomfortable, institutional chairs in public waiting rooms with complete
strangers, and conducted his morning hygiene in the public restroom. Overpriced
cookies and crackers from vending machines were his daily diet. Through it all,
he persevered in hope, and kept his keen sense of humor.
To encourage him and help him pass the time, 82-year old Spunky
Sarah (a fellow Faith Folder) and I put on our angel wings one cold and
blustery January day and took the Amtrak to Philly to spend time with Carl as
he sat by his beloved’s bedside. Concerned about us finding him at this
behemoth hospital, and eager for a friendly visit, he left his wife’s bedside,
hopped on a mass transit bus, rode across the City of Brotherly Love and met us
at the train station.
Sarah and I treated him to a hot lunch in the cafeteria and
listened to his stories: “I bath in the public restroom,” he chuckled. “One day
I was sitting by Margaret’s side, when a stranger walked in. ‘Sir,’ he asked, ‘are
you missing anything?’ I thought, and answered ‘I don’t think so.’ The man held
out his hand and there were my teeth! I didn’t even realize they weren’t in my
mouth.” We erupted in hearty laughter.
Then, needing to make sure we got back to 30th Street Station on
time, Carl accompanied us to the bus stop wearing only a light fleece jacket on
a very
cold winter day. Since the dear old man was freezing on behalf of us, I
took off my bright pink ear muff and wrapped it around his snow white hair and cold
bare ears. I added to his attire my colorful Cashmere scarf tucking it neatly around
his neck, and then finished by enveloping his frozen fingers in my toasty red
gloves. The three of us waited for what
seemed like an hour in wind whipped weather for the bus. Carl was a silly sight
to behold! But, he managed to deliver Sarah and me to the train station; and
then, proceeded to make the trek back to the hospital to sit by Marge’s
bedside.
A bit later Marge was transferred to a rehab hospital 30
miles from home. Every week I would put on my angel wings and drive Carl to the
hospital to visit his beloved bride. Spunky old Sarah would go with me.
I’d drive his little blue Honda Civic and he’d tease me
about my lead foot and inept parking abilities.
By Marge’s hospital bed, Sarah and I had a beautiful window view
to look in on their precious souls. Tears filled my eyes as I watched Carl tenderly
comb her hair, gently kiss her lips, and repeatedly tell her he loved her. Sadly,
Marge never recovered and eventually died. I was incredibly blessed to have
walked through the valley of death with these darling old folks.
Through their hardship I learned valuable lessons about
love, laughter and endurance.
How does the Easter Bunny travel?
By hare-plane!
What do you call a rabbit that tells good jokes?
A funny bunny!
A funny bunny!
I have learned that angel wings, old folks, and corny jokes make Good Friday good in deed.